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#1
Mar 25, 2026, 06:07 PM
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I know this is my ACOA acting up. Haven’t delved into the topic with my therapist. That’s tomorrow. And my alcoholic dad has been dead for I don’t know how long- 3 years? That’s not that long when you think about it. I’m m also afraid of conflict- arguments especially!
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat - He who sings prays twice Ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 6 mg  Gabapentin 1800 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
 CANDC
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#2
Mar 25, 2026, 07:07 PM
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My mom has only been gone three years but I still feel some of those inner unsettled issues cropping up @Moose72
CANDC [If you want me to see your reply to this post please tag me by including @CANDC in your message - not in requoting my message and not the first word of your message]
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Super Moderator Community Support Team "Things Take Time" |
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#3
Mar 26, 2026, 09:06 AM
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The silent treatment is the worst - intentional or not. People don't get the fact that such things are a form of abandonment, and for us, that's a fundamental trigger. My dad used the silent treatment, for days at a time and sometimes for weeks, and all the family had growing fears of his upcoming explosion.
Possible trigger:
The tactic I use is to reduce the importance of other people's opinions, if not the people themselves. To rationalize that no matter what they think, I am who I am, flaws and all, worthy of respect and compassion. It's hard to remember to love yourself in such situations, but when you can, it makes a huge difference. |
| unaluna
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 unaluna
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#4
Yesterday, 05:39 PM
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Knock-knock "Helloo? Anybody home? Just dropping by to see how y'all are doing.
One doesn't assume anyone's mad at them when one stops thinking so poorly of themselves. A little self-respect changes our perceptions of other people and the world we're in. Today's theme among my folks was love, a thing which can seem like a myth and has often seemed like a lie. And self-love? Ha - long road to that one, eh? Like, one needs to stop self-hatred (I found out that hating myself did no good because I didn't go away). Then I had to accept myself - which means I had to throw perfectionism out the window. Somewhere in there I noticed my better attributes and recognized the causes of the flaws, and so it was okay, then, to start making eye contact with myself in the bathroom mirror, and saying to myself, "I love you." After weeks of doing it daily, I started to mean it. |
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