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#1
Oct 11, 2026, 08:46 PM
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Since Thursday, I have had no gas in my tank, so to speak. It's a depressive episode. I'm only 4 days into it, and the hole I'm in is not very deep, compared to past holes I've been in. But I'm really alarmed that I've gotten this down out of the blue.
It has something to do with the change of season. Been overcast and dark a lot. I don't like the shorter days. I've not been getting out of my apartment much, and that brings me down. I live alone and feel isolated. My plan was to find more to do in my community, once the weather cooled. Well, the oppressive heat is gone, and I've not made a move to find something worth participating in. So I blame myself for not making a good plan and sticking to it. I held off on starting this thread because I hate to go on a binge of whining. But this is getting too serious. I haven't gotten out of pajamas in 2 days. I'm not making decent meals for days. My lunch earlier was a chocolate bar and a glass of milk. It helps me out, when others remind me that this won't last forever. My depression comes in episodes. In between episodes I often feel quite good. I'ld been doing really well for a good stretch of time. So I am really disappointed to now be back sliding on that slippery slope. Do any of you reading this get "episodic" depression? And how do you weather your episodes? I'll try to put together a decent supper and, maybe, find a nice movie. I always feel less depressed in the evening. Daytime is hard. Has anyone else noticed a pattern like that? Thanks for any encouragement that anyone can spare. |
 Discombobulated
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#2
Oct 11, 2026, 11:32 PM
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Rose, some people find it helpful to go outside first thing in the morning, without sunglasses, for 5-10 minutes, no matter the weather, to get sunlight, even on overcast days. You do not need to look at the sun, though. Just don't wear sunglasses; look around. Can you water plants on your patio? Can you put a coat over your pajamas to look presentable outside in case a neighbor sees you? It takes little effort to throw a coat over your pajamas without getting out of them or committing to a day of purposeful activities. You're only committing to 5-10 minutes outside first thing in the morning, then you can go back to bed. For many people, it helps.
Although you do not have bipolar disorder, I think you will find helpful tidbits in Social Rhythm Therapy. Look at these books: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=social+rh...ps-ranker_2_13 Can you go to the library and read there, being close to people and not necessarily interacting with them?
__________________
Bipolar I w/psychotic features Last inpatient stay in 2018 Zyprexa 3.75 mg Naltrexone 25 mg Zepbound 10 mg Vitamin B-complex (against extrapyramidal side effects) Long-term side effects from medications, some of them discontinued: - Hypothyroidism for life - Obesity, but we are working on making it less so |
| Rose76
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 Rose76
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#3
Oct 12, 2026, 09:58 AM
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Rose76, I'm sorry you're slipping into a depressive episode. Even when we know it probably won't last forever and we know that we have periods where we feel better it can still feel overwhelming.
I do think the changing seasons can be a factor, I mean, SAD is its own category. Have you ever thought about getting one of the SAD Sun lamps. That's something my psychiatrist recommended to me years ago and I did find it helpful. The idea is you turn it on and sit next to it with it shining on you, but not looking directly at it, for about half an hour a day.
__________________
 "I danced in the morning when the world was begun. I danced in the moon and the stars and the sun". From my favourite hymn. "If you see the wonder in a fairy tale, you can take the future even if you fail." Abba 
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| Rose76
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| Rose76, Tart Cherry Jam
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#4
Today, 03:56 PM
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I've improved over the last two days. I think this episode might be over. The main thing is to push myself. I got my neglected home straightened up. That helps. Depression leads to me neglecting everything. Then, having a messy house makes me more depressed. At least, I didn't let things get too bad this time.
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